Honor Code Office Imprisoned Inside Chalk Circle

PROVO—Ready to go home after a long day’s work, Carl Jamison stepped out of his office this afternoon, surprised to see a familiar sight in an unfamiliar place. Surrounding the entire Honor Code office was a clearly drawn chalk circle. For Jamison, that meant his day was about to get much longer.

“At first, I panicked. You get plenty of training, and our protocol posters are very clear, but nothing could have prepared me for this,” said Jamison. “All I could do was follow my training and hurry back into the office to let everybody else know what was going on.”

Settling down for the long haul, the Honor Code office employees began preparing for the worst, pulling out Ziploc bags of Cheerios and designating the “bathroom corner.” Soon, an ethical dilemma broke out.

“Jack was kicking back in his chair when I noticed his stubble was getting a little long,” commented employee Nathalie Dempka. “I asked him when he last shaved and he told me his hair grew so quickly he had to shave every day. That’s how the fight started.”

Arguments erupted as employees debated whether to break the dress and grooming standards or leave the chalk circle. David Labinski, a student employee, argued the “ox in the mire” paradigm, while his desk mate Robert Copart began to demonstrate how to sharpen plastic knives in the kitchen until they were sharp enough to shave with.

The crisis was cut short when a student janitor with her headphones on unknowingly vacuumed up the chalk, leaving the entire office free to return home after just twenty minutes of captivity.